Winter 2007 Soccer Letter #10                                   

 

Game #9:   Bent Like Beckham:  2                        The Gargoyles: Who cares?

 

Last match was the end of the dramatic climb to the coveted “Second From Last Place” spot for the Bent Like Beckham winter squad. The game started as most did, with the jostling of fans hanging from the rafters just to get a glimpse, a wee look you might say, of the Folk Heroes of Football, Bent Like Beckham.

 

Text Box:  With all of the commotion, the game was delayed for a record 2 ½ minutes, as the thundering applause, the clapping and cheering, the shower of roses and 2 for 1 coupons at Mr. Sub, as well as the occasional “twang” of a pair of women’s underwear as they gently float down from the crowd, (yes, they were leopard print) all of which prevented the players from taking to the field, or rather, a highly polished gym floor.

 

It was this support (and not so much the flying underwear) that lead to the nomination and eventual win, of the Lady Bing Award for the Bent Like Beckham Football Club. (That’s right, we ACTUALLY WON SOMETHING. Hurray!!!!) Upon hearing the news of our unexpected win, fans from around the world celebrated. And the cheers of “Get Bent” echoed well into the night. (An occassional “Get Bend It” could be heard from the lone Irish Exchange Student.) Naturally, given the name of the Team, and the spirit of the Award, Teams from this point forward that win the Lady Bing Award, shall forever be referred to in an endearing sort of way as, being “Bent Like Bing”.

 

The matches usually begin with the sound of a whistle, however, as this isn’t the English Premier League, a slight nod or discreet cough is just as good. With the game officially underway, Team Bent relied on their skills and agility as always, to lead the way on to certain victory. However, as we had recently lost 8 in a row, a more delicate and slightly unorthodox approach was perhaps needed.

 

After singling out the star player on the Gargoyles forward line, Team Karate Instructor and part-time Sous Chef, Philippe “That man scratched my cleats with his face” Beckham, did the only thing an ex-French Paratrooper would do, a swift roundhouse to the head as shown below left. Not wanting to be outdone by Philippe, Tony “I think that shirt is Mine” Beckham, went down on his man hard while trying to rip off his man’s shirt. (In other words, it was just another Saturday night for Tony).  Paving the way as to what surely must be a well thought out and sure win strategy, the rest of the Team, bottom right, lead by Brian “Call me Brian” Beckham found the few remaining Gargoyle Players and jumped on them with what is commonly known in playgrounds around the world, as the “Dog Pile”.

 

 

 

 

Upon seeing the success from each member of the Team, Peter “I’m not quite clear on the strategy” Beckham, tried his own form of tackle on the Gargoyle Player. You can take your pick from the photo on the left as to which one is Peter, as either position is a little hard to explain. Never the less, both players exchanged phone numbers to continue they’re discussion at a later date.

 

Text Box: Peter BeckhamAlas, although Team Bent had the spirit and the global support that rivals even the great Football Clubs of the World, such as Real Madrid and Manchester United, the final match went to the Gargoyles. Sure, they won the match, but they’ll never be Bent Like Bing.  Thanks for a great Winter Season everyone.

 

 

Sincerely,

Tom Beckham

Team Captain and All Around Great Guy