Winter 2007 Soccer Letter #7


Game #7: Bent Like Beckham: 1 Kicking and Screaming: 2


The stands broke out into a frenzy on Thursday night as the underdogs, Bent Like Beckham, charged forward into another exhilarating display of soccer (football). Team Assistant Captain and All Around Adequate Guy, Peter "The Hands" Beckham lead the Team through a fast paced ping-pong style match that almost ended in a well deserved tie. So well deserved one could almost taste it. Not realizing of course that Brian “Is it still a cold sore if my lips are warm” Beckham, happened to be drinking out of everyone's water bottles during the game. So, the bitter taste of defeat, was really in a way, just Brian's cold sores on everyone's water bottles. Nonetheless, Brian's medical problems aside, the match was brilliant and thoroughly enjoyed.


Team Bent's lone goal happened to be brought about by a combination of Philippe "I wear a size 14 shoe" Beckham and the air vent behind Team "Kicking and Screaming's" Net. By combining these two unique items and a number of Grade 10 Physics Laws, that probably nobody understands anyways, Philippe's shot went something like this: Enter Stage Left, Philippe. Philippe runs up the center of the gym "Run, Run, Run, Huff, Huff, Huff"........."Huff, Huff, Huff"............."Huff, Huff, Huff"......"Huff".....Philippe looks up, sees the goal and...and...wait for it....."KA-BOOOOOM" ..... At a speed faster than you can say "Bonjour Monsieur", the ball breaks the sound barrier, flies past the Goalie, flies past the net, somehow, behind any kind of reasoning, hits that one in a million spot on the air vent behind the goal, bounces back again and into the back of the other Team's Goalie and yes, straight into their net. Pretty? No. Good enough for Team Bent? You better believe it.


With the thoughts of, dare I say it, “a tie” looming on the ever distant horizon, Team Bent players, Tony “There’s only enough room in my pants for the three of us” Beckham, Summer “I thought it was Day Lights Saving Time” Beckham, Denise “Call me Scarlet” Beckham, Tom “I’m telling you, That girl’s a Man Baby” Beckham, Pam “I’ve never met a Peter I didn’t like” Beckham, Peter “I’m just saying” Beckham, Stephanie “I didn’t know he was only 15” Beckham, Philippe “I speak 47 languages, most of them are French” Beckham and Brian “Does anyone have some cream I could borrow?” Beckham, played like there was no tomorrow….well, until tomorrow came….Final Score Team Bent 1, the other guys 2.


Not letting a small setback prevent them from enjoying a great game or from finding the nearest pub, Bent Like Beckham charged off into the night to the closest pub, so appropriately named “Beckhams Pub”. Really. A fitting end a great game.


See you tomorrow night for another exciting match.


Tom Beckham

Team Captain and All Around Great Guy