Game #1: Bent Like Beckham: 2 Jimmy Hat Tricks: 5
Everything wasn’t exactly coming up roses for the first match of Spring, it was an epic struggle between the good (Bent Like Beckham) and the not so good, for dramatic purposes only, (Jimmy Hat Tricks). Team Bent was to find out that the name “Jimmy Hat Tricks” wasn’t just a clever name, but was more of a statement on their goal scoring ability.
The first half started out a bit like an episode from the Simpsons, at first everything looked good, but things usually go to pot by the end of the first commercial. Team Bent was still trying to find their “outdoor legs”, however, a lot of trips, stumbles and balls to the groin were more than enough to shake the cobwebs off and get Bent Like Beckham back onto their feet. The first goal of the season came from some might say, an unlikely source, Andrew “I’ve got a pill for that” Beckham. The instant replay actually showed the ball going off of Andrew’s groin and into the net, but hey, a goal is a goal. By the end of the first half, the score was Bent Like Beckham 1, Jimmy Hat Tricks 1.
The second half starts to get a little blurry as Jimmy Hat Tricks managed to get a few subs onto the field, namely Cristiano Ronaldo, Ronaldino and Kaka. From that point forward, exactly what happened was anybody’s guess. After a mere 20 minutes it was 5-1. With help from his Coaching Staff (a nine year old boy and his sister) Stuart “It was never like this in U-10” Beckham, played an outstanding game, letting in only 5 of the 520 shots on net. Up for Goalie of the year again this season, Stuart had a few brief words for the cameras, “I’d like to thank Billy and Alex from Mrs. Callum’s Math Class for all their help taking shots at me during recess, thanks guys, I’ll see you in Home Room”.
Team Bent’s second goal, comes from a player that seems to be making a name for himself in the Bent Like Beckham lineup for somehow being in the right place at the right time, Tony “Are you sure she’s a guy?” Beckham, who managed to score on a header. It was more like a “facer” which could really only help Tony is some regards, but that is strictly a technicality. Additional outstanding play on the field was seen from Rannie “I prefer Dartmouth” Beckham, Philippe “Bonjour, Je m’appelle Philippe” Beckham, Steve “What exactly is syphilis?” Beckham, Laura “I know I’m married, but here’s my number anyways” Spice, Tom “I put the Sock in Soccer” Beckham, Tracy “What do you mean I’m under arrest” Spice, and Desiree “I never met a man (or woman) I didn’t like” Spice.
The match ended with a 5-2 victory going to Jimmy Hat Tricks, it was a good game with outstanding efforts on both sides. Later it was noticed that Jimmy Hat Tricks had a little youngster on the sidelines with them, some might say this gave them the competitive advantage, but truly, we’ll never know. By the look of the kid, I’m not sure the words “Lady Bing” really spring to mind? Anyways, Great Game everyone and we’ll see you next week when we play “Scoregasm”. (Sounds like fun), check out the Website for Game Info.
Team Captain and All Around Great Guy
Voted Most Likely to win a Dream Home in Red Deer