Spring Soccer Letter No. 2

Welcome to Spring Soccer Letter No. 2, the second soccer letter in a continuing series, and the first to report on the glorious achievements of Bent Like Beckham in the 2011 Spring Soccer season. 

The good news?  So far, the team's dealings with the police have been limited to a single investigation under s. 15(1) of the City of Calgary's Dog Control Bylaw No. 23M2006, which prohibits team mascot, Blake, from entering or remaining in or on any schoolyard, playground or sports field.

 Bad Blake.  Bad dog.

Once that unpleasantness was taken care of, it was on to the unpleasantness of the games themselves.  Let's go to the videotape ....

Bent Like Beckham 5 - The Football Factory 4

The Bent side got off to a good start with their all time leading scorer, Brian, leading the scoring with a nifty little goal in the third minute, which added to his all time scoring lead.  A few minutes later, Brian struck again, increasing his all time scoring lead by chipping in his second goal after a pretty little run up the pitch.

But the goal of the night undoubtedly came off of the toe of Tracy, who lofted a long, dribbly shot from midfield the lurched and bounced ever so slowly towards the goal.  A two year old could have stopped it.  Fortunately for Bent Like Beckham, there was no two year old in the goal on this night, and the ball skipped and rolled gently past the waiting arms of the keeper and right through the middle of the goal.

Then, Tracy kept the scoring barrage going, this time surprising Stuart by punching in her first Own Goal of the year (she'd put up another in the second half).

By half time, Bent Like Beckham had a comfortable 4-1 lead (Brian had already completed his hat trick) by then.  It looked like the Team would skate to an easy win in their first game.

It turns out that skating and soccer don't mix.  Only minutes into the second half, Tracy completed her hat trick, two thirds of which were scored into her Own Goal.  After another quick strike, the score stood at 4-3 and the Beckham side was reeling.  At that point, Team Captain (and all around good guy) Tom ordered everyone to take off their skates and get serious.  Tony got serious first, drilling a high penalty kick into the goal from the gentlest of set ups from Peter.  The Football Factory got it back and then Brigitte and the rest of the defense held off a furious barrage to eke out a 5-4 victory.

And in the midst of all of these great plays, the highlight of the night was unquestionably when Sandro got clobbered in the face by a ball, sending his ass right over his tea kettle.

That was hilarious.

Bent Like Beckham 0 - John Rambo United 5

It was a dreary night at the Senator Patrick Burns Pitch.  The sky was dark, and the thunder rumbled ominously in the distance.  The Team was forced to take to the rain soaked field with a bare quorum of players in attendance, since many of their number were unable to play:  Brian (upper body injury - indefinitely), Claudia (upper face injury - 3 weeks), Stuart (religious observance) and Patrick ("just wasn't up to it") all sent their regrets.

So, the Bent Side went with its fifth string keeper and Brigitte and Tracy were forced to play the entire game without a break, even though Tracy was hobbled by a Charlie horse and Brigitte had just come from the medal podium of a 12 km race she completed that afternoon.  Good thing they were both "up to it".  

Bent Like Beckham had enthusiasm and experience on their side.  John Rambo United had enthusiasm, youth, speed and skill on their side.  Youth, speed and skill is > experience every time. 

Just like in the movies, Rambo struck early and often. After their first 2 goals, 5th string keeper Peter decided to play a little deeper in goal.  It didn't seem to help.  In no time, JRU scored 3 more.  On the plus side, Dave banged one shot really hard off of the goal post. 

However, the highlight of this night happened in penalty time.  Philippe corralled a rebound and blasted it at the goal, only to be absolutely robbed by the youthful, speedy and skilled keeper.  Phil's shot skipped out to Tom (Team Captain and all around good guy) who found himself unmarked 3 feet from the goal line and with nothing but wide open empty net in front of him.  Somehow, he hoofed it 10 feet over the crossbar as the final whistle blew. 

That was hilarious.

In other soccer news:

David Beckham attended a LA Lakers playoff game last week, where he bumped into actress January Jones (soon to be seen as Emma Frost in X-Men: First Class).   The next day, January announced that she was pregnant. 

Beckham can do that with just a look.  In fact, he's doing it right there.  That look right there.  Beware the eyes of Beckham, ladies.

Bent Like Beckham returns to the pitch Sunday night at Collingwood School, 3826 Collingwood Drive NW against The Awesomeballs.  On Saturday, Man City defeated Stoke City to win the FA Cup, the first time they've won the big game since 1969.  Which match will offer more thrills and excitement?

Probably the FA Cup.  But the Bent match will surely be more hilarious.


Go Bend It!!!