In an attempt to ease the workload of Tom (our organizer, captain and self-proclaimed great guy) we have decided to spread around the soccer letter writing duties. No one else volunteered this week so I'm jumping in and also getting my letter out of the way. In no way am I trying to usurp the miniscule power that Tom has as the OCSPGG (see above). I am also not going to try to duplicate Tom's tongue-in-cheek style. I will heap abuse on those that need and/or deserve it.

 In a tribute to Canada's greatest living poet Stompin Tom Connors (I swear they introduced him that way at the concert last night) the game review will be sung to the tune of every Stompin Tom song...

 

Stompin Tom Connors

 

Hello out there,

we're on the air,

It's soccer night tonight.

The tension grows,

No whistle blows,

But the ball is kicked outta sight.

The grass is long,

the bugs aren't nice,

but we score three times, not twice!

Someone Roars

Brian scores!

At the good old soccer game..

 

(You know the chorus so sing along)

 

Ooooh, the good old soccer game...

 

Second half...

We're down four three

But we don't worry,

Cause we're in deep grass on D.

The girls are beat,

cause they can't take a seat,

But they don't make a peep.

The other team,

with eyes agleam,

may have won the game

But we don't care

since we have beer!

At the good old soccer game

 

Oooh...

 

Well that's probably enough of that tripe. I apologise to anyone who gets that terrible song stuck in their head (either my version or Stompin Tom's).

 Thanks to everyone who made it to the game. Even SuperFan Ellen. Her shouts of "Get moving you bunch of desk jockeys" really inspired us to greater effort. It was great to see Roy there cheering for the Bent Like Beckhamians. We need a mascot that isn't a grotty 43 year old!

 We had a treat when we witnessed the return of Tom (my groin hurts so please rub it). Tracy must have made him wear a sweater as he was in fine form. Tom wanted me to encourage eveyone to pay him his $30 or I may have to come have a little chat with you. I always used to protect him when he was a kid and some bully (not Ian) was picking on him.

 Stuart (the great wall) made several amazing saves to go along with a few miscues (just kidding Stuie).

I'm not kidding.

I really thought that I was going to get a goal. Just one goal! For pity's sake can't I just get a goal? It was not to be this week but I am going to shout a jug of beer the night I finally get on the scoresheet. (Maybe you guys will pass to me now)

 Carly (I'm too hung over to play) gets a special award for the weakest excuse for missing a game in the history of sport.

 Peter gets a special award for the best graft of Stampede 2006. Thanks to Pete for the copious drink tickets. Too bad we gave away 100 of them when we left :( Those of you who didn't get invited can complain here http://www.thefreedictionary.com/piss+off

 I know what Tom means when he said these letters take time. I didn't even add a picture of a scantily clad athletic supporter... ok just one for each gender.

CUTE SWEDISH SPORTS FAN  

God Bless(ed) Sweden