Summer Soccer Letter #6
Hello Party People, this one will be short as I have been in Montana all week, and I am presently at my parent’s house in Medicine Hat. Ah, all the fond high school memories. And by fond I actually mean awkward and embarrassing. And by awkward and embarrassing I actually mean painful. Ah, all the painful, painful memories.
Anyway, to make a long story short, we got our collective asses handed to us last game by a bunch of dirty Russians. Actually, I think there was only one Russian. He might not have even been Russian. So, I guess we got our asses handed to us by the Center Street Hooligans which included one person who I believe was of Eastern European decent. And he was kind of a jerk.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot. They were also playing a person short.
However, we did have two fantastic goals scored. One by our ringer Colin (if that is his real name) who headed a beautiful ball crossed by Steve “Thank you Brian for asking me to play”. The goal looked something like this…
Steve “I am a soccer God” scored the second time off a ball that accidentally deflected off my shin. That is the type of goal that we at Team Beckham aspire for. None of this fancy shmanzy skill stuff. It is all about total dumb luck. Although I have to give props to my main man Steve. It was a nice finish. It looked nothing like this….
Special shout outs to Laura “Where the hell are our subs” and Carly “Insert MC Hammer joke here” for their solid 80 minute performance on the field. Also to Jeff “Peter’s son” and Stuart “a concussion can’t stop me” who took one for the team (in the head) and still managed to take off the gloves, elbow and knee pads and play the field for awhile.
Our next game is sometime on Sunday against some other team. And this time we are going to Win!!!!!! Hopefully we will have more subs this time, especially for the women. If I had to play the whole 80 minutes, you would be taking me off in a stretcher.
And now for your viewing pleasure……. Leonard Nimoy