Welcome to Summer Soccer Letter #7
The game last week was a bit of a nail biter, as the ebb and flow of the game was back and forth like a bad clip from the movie Poseidon. Team Beckham took a shot at net (usually about 50' above the goal posts - which we now fondly refer to as a "Pulling a Tony") and the Touchdowns would take a shot and that would bounce around the goal like a bag of marbles, somehow, managing to find it's way in.
Laura was all over the other team, mostly their girls. One had to wonder whether to try to stop what was happening or provide a little encouragement to see were things might lead. Just as well, as our Team wouldn't be able to focus on the game as well as Laura's conquests on the field. Team Manager and all around great guy, Tom "Why do I make this sh*t up", had this to say about the incident. "Hey if Laura can distract their players, men or women, for 5 minutes and help the Team out, then I say - go for it". (So much for political correctness.)
Their players were a bit touchy-feely as well, like in the photo below, which lead to some tossing around between our Team and their 1/2 woman - 1/2 gorilla players. How do you politically correct tackle a female John Wayne? Granted, it does lead to some imaginative tackles on our part, but I'm not sure that it lead to the desired result. Anyways, while we nursed our wounds and laughed after the match, their female players continued their testosterone shots, so everyone was happy.
On one rather odd breakaway, the Touchdowns, (shown in Green below), tried to get past Team Beckham. Proving their defense is second to none, Team Beckham players, Peter "Call me Pedro", Brian "I like my socks to be pulled waaay up" and Steve "Does my voice sound like George Bush in a tunnel", proved to be an impenetrable wall. True, their methods may be a little questionable, especially their apparent fascination with the massive behind of the player below, however, at the end of the day, their methods proved satisfactory, although somewhat disturbing.
Stuart "I'm allergic to reality”, decided to take the play to the other team and charge up the mid-field. Leaving some to wonder, what position Stuart was actually playing and most, however, to wonder, why he doesn't wear the Beckham Team Shirt or for that matter, any clothes whatsoever. When questioned about this, Stuart responded, "I like to feel the wind rustle through my hair when I play, and so does "Little Stuart". Nice. That's another image I'm sure we could have all done without.
Team Beckham players, Carly "I run like the wind" and Tracy "I think I broke a nail", sported the new Beckham Summer uniforms. Their excitement could hardly be restrained and lead to an affectionate hug, proudly encouraged by the rest of the Team Beckham players, who are never ones to stand in the way of any girl-on-girl sign of affections.